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ICER Clan Hell's Horses Galaxy Commander
Joined: 04-Feb-2002 00:00 Posts: 1663 Location: United States
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Posted: 06-Oct-2003 18:50 Post subject: Stupid is, as stupid does |
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I don't know if half of these are true. But they sure are funny. So brighten your day. and have a read.
1. WILL THE REAL DUMMY PLEASE STAND UP?
AT&T fired President John Walter after nine months, saying he lacked
intellectual leadership. He received a $26 million severance package.
Perhaps it's not Walter who's lacking intelligence.
2. WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM OUR FRIENDS:
Police in Oakland, California spent two hours attempting to subdue a gunman
who had barricaded himself inside his home. After firing ten tear gas
canisters, officers discovered that the man was standing beside them in the
police line, shouting, "Please come out and give yourself up."
3. WHAT WAS PLAN B???
An Illinois man, pretending to have a gun, kidnapped a motorist and forced
him to drive to two different automated teller machines, wherein the
kidnapper proceeded to withdraw money from his own bank accounts.
4. THE GETAWAY!
A man walked into a Topeka, Kansas, Kwik Stop, and asked for all the money
in the cash drawer. Apparently, the take was too small, so he tied up the
store clerk and worked the counter himself for three hours until police
showed up and grabbed him.
5. DID I SAY THAT???
Police in Los Angeles had good luck with a robbery suspect who just couldn't
control himself during a lineup. When detectives asked each man in the
lineup to repeat the words: "Give me all your money or I'll shoot," the man
shouted, "That's not what I said!"
6. ARE WE COMMUNICATING??
A man spoke frantically into the phone, "My wife is pregnant and her
contractions are only two minutes apart!" "Is this her first child?" the
doctor asked. "No!" the man shouted, "This is her husband!"
7. NOT THE SHARPEST TOOL IN THE SHED!!
In Modesto, California, Steven Richard King was arrested for trying to hold
up a Bank of America branch without a weapon. King used a thumb and a
finger to simulate a gun, but unfortunately, he failed to keep his hand in
his pocket (hellllllooooooo!)
8. THE GRAND FINALE (I LOVE THIS ONE!!!)
Last summer, down on Lake Isabella, located in the high desert, an hour east
of Bakersfield, California, some folks, new to boating, were having problem.
No matter how hard they tried, they couldn't get their brand new 22 ft. boat
going. It was very sluggish in almost every maneuver, no matter how much
power was applied. After about an hour of trying to make it go, they putted
to a nearby marina, thinking someone there could tell them what was wrong.
A thorough topside check revealed everything in perfect working condition.
The engine ran fine, the out drive went up and down, and the prop was the
correct size and pitch. So, one of the marina guys jumped in the water to
check underneath. He came up choking on water, he was laughing so hard. NOW
REMEMBER...THIS IS TRUE... Under the boat, still strapped securely in place,
was the trailer.
Does any one else find it frightening the majority of these took place in
California??
_________________
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Motown Scrapper Clan Ice Hellions Galaxy Commander
Joined: 24-Jul-2003 00:00 Posts: 2074 Location: United States
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Posted: 07-Oct-2003 00:34 Post subject: RE: Stupid is, as stupid does |
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No Nor am I surprised that is just more examples of what is wrong with that state.
_________________ Having more fun than a human being should be allowed to have-Rush Limbaugh www.rushlimbaugh.com
Force of nature
Still crazy after all these years
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Daphne Wilde Star League Defense Force Lieutenant Colonel
Joined: 19-Sep-2003 00:00 Posts: 425 Location: United States
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Posted: 07-Oct-2003 02:40 Post subject: RE: Stupid is, as stupid does |
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The Irony of this universe does not escape me..... / / /
_________________ Lt.Col.Daphne Wilde 504 Para. 82 Div. Io
? & ?
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Sir Henry Team Bansai Senior Tech Specialist
Joined: 04-Feb-2002 00:00 Posts: 4899 Location: United States
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Posted: 07-Oct-2003 07:25 Post subject: RE: Stupid is, as stupid does |
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It proves that the Universe has a sense of humor.....
_________________ Sir Henry
A Dragon in the disguise of a bunny, is still a Dragon.
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Daphne Wilde Star League Defense Force Lieutenant Colonel
Joined: 19-Sep-2003 00:00 Posts: 425 Location: United States
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Posted: 08-Oct-2003 01:42 Post subject: RE: Stupid is, as stupid does |
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It should were both in it......
_________________ Lt.Col.Daphne Wilde 504 Para. 82 Div. Io
? & ?
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Stinger The Knights of Chaos General
Joined: 30-Apr-2002 00:00 Posts: 1833 Location: United States
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Posted: 11-Oct-2003 01:52 Post subject: RE: Stupid is, as stupid does |
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Lol! I have heard that last one. several times. I would venture a guess that they are all real. They sound silly. But if you ever watch americas dumbest criminals you'll know what I mean.
_________________ Stinger If it's "creepy" to use the Internet, military satellites, and robot aircraft to find a house full of gorgeous young models so I can drop in on them unexpected, then FINE, I'm "creepy". Howard Wolowitz. BBT.
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Daphne Wilde Star League Defense Force Lieutenant Colonel
Joined: 19-Sep-2003 00:00 Posts: 425 Location: United States
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Posted: 11-Oct-2003 14:18 Post subject: RE: Stupid is, as stupid does |
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A Quote from Mr. G.Carlin :" Imagine how dumb the average person is and realise that half the people in the world are dumber than that."
Kinda says it all, don"t it...
_________________ Lt.Col.Daphne Wilde 504 Para. 82 Div. Io
? & ?
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Nightmare Lyran Alliance Kommandant-General
Joined: 03-May-2002 00:00 Posts: 2214
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Posted: 12-Oct-2003 01:04 Post subject: RE: Stupid is, as stupid does |
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There's another one that says the average intelligence of a group gets lower as the group grows... Or rather that the stupidity gets thicker in a group. Finnish is a wonderful language for describing complex things with few words:
"Joukossa tyhmyys tiivistyy"
_________________ A tree fall in the forest, and no one is around, and it hits a mime. Does anyone care?
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Daphne Wilde Star League Defense Force Lieutenant Colonel
Joined: 19-Sep-2003 00:00 Posts: 425 Location: United States
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Posted: 12-Oct-2003 03:21 Post subject: RE: Stupid is, as stupid does |
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So is french....
Mearde !
_________________ Lt.Col.Daphne Wilde 504 Para. 82 Div. Io
? & ?
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Hardware Clan Ghost Bear Star Colonel
Joined: 04-Feb-2002 00:00 Posts: 605 Location: United States
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Posted: 12-Oct-2003 21:19 Post subject: RE: Stupid is, as stupid does |
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Quote:
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On 2003-10-12 03:21, Lt.Col.Daphne Wilde wrote:
So is french....
Mearde !
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As the designated Chihawk stand in; I have no opinion on the French.
_________________ The more I get to know people the more I like my dog.
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Sir Henry Team Bansai Senior Tech Specialist
Joined: 04-Feb-2002 00:00 Posts: 4899 Location: United States
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Posted: 13-Oct-2003 07:23 Post subject: RE: Stupid is, as stupid does |
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As they say: A person is smart and wise. People are stupid and foolish....
Or something like that....
_________________ Sir Henry
A Dragon in the disguise of a bunny, is still a Dragon.
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